Child of Captivity
by MissGoodPage
Summary: Kíli gives birth to a son whilst imprisoned in Mirkwood and is terrified that his child is going to be taken from him. This is Kíli x Fíli, dark, angsty, with incest being forbidden so there's trouble ahead.
1. Chapter 1

**"Child of Captivity"**

* * *

_Summary_: Kíli gives birth to a son whilst imprisoned in Mirkwood.

_Notes:_ Inspired by prompt: Kili gives birth while they're imprisoned by the elves (or orcs if you want to go dark) and is terrified out of their mind that his child is going to be taken from him. This is Kíli x Fíli, dark, angsty, with incest being forbidden so there's trouble ahead.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters, no copyright infringement intended.

* * *

Kíli shivered. His brown eyes dilated as his body convulsed. This wasn't supposed to happen, not here and not now.

_No, No, No._

The thoughts sounded in his head, then became a mantra and before he knew it he was whispering the words into the thin air. It became hard to breathe and he grasped blindly at the stone walls behind him, and kicked his feet against the iron bars of his cell.

Sweat started to pour down his face and tears formed in his eyes. His whole body was trembling as shock after shock waved through his tummy and it felt as if his body was about to be torn apart.

_No, for the sake of Durin, no._

Luckily he had the mind to unbuckle his belt and to slide the trousers down his trembling legs. They were wet, he realized, covered in blood, and he weakly kicked them aside before he fell back on his back and gritted his teeth in agony.

The bars offered an open view and if any of the elves would come now they'd spot him there, naked, body trembling and voice hoarse of agonizing screams as he clawed his hands at the dirt of the ground. Blood covered his thighs and started to pool in between his legs but he couldn't care less.

Though he wished no one would find him like this.

His eyes closed firmly in pain and he arched his back. 'Not yet,' he thought, 'it's too soon.' But he wanted to push and squeeze the little rascal out of his body for it just _hurt_ to keep him in.

In the darkness he could hear the imaginative whisper of his brother, shushing him and telling him that all would be all right and if he could just keep strong. And he tried. He really, really tried, but in the end he cursed his brother loudly for his predicament and pushed, pushed much too soon.

His body tore and he yelled, but he pushed again for he knew that dwarves were made to do this, that they survived births like these and that he could do this too. With or without help.

The moment seemed to last his entire life, but after hours of clawing at the stones, pushing and crying in the dark another new cry mixed with his own and he knew that he had succeeded. The tiny body had slipped away with one final push, out of his body and onto the cold stone floor, into a puddle of blood.

He tried his best to reach over for the babe and found his eyes grow wide when he realized the umbilical cord was wrapped round the dwarfling's throat and he instantly snatched at it and unwrapped it before cradling the baby in his arms. The cord hadn't been around him that tight, and the youngling was all right but still the fear of losing the child was fresh in Kíli's mind and he coddled the child and kissed the baby's head as he pressed him close to his chest.

"You're safe now," he said, still lying on his back, "you're all right."

His brown eyes widened when he for the first time realized that this was _his_ child he was holding, _his _baby, and how beautiful the child actually was. With a tuft of blond hair on top of his head and bright blue eyes, there could be no mistaking who the other parent was.

"So much like him." Kíli muttered, and kissed the child again.

The dwarf felt tired. His muscles ached and his body was sore. Yet the leaking hadn't stopped and violent tremors followed before his body discarded of the placenta. He helped the child up in his hands and looked around, but finding nothing sharp – for the elves had taken all their weapons- he saw no other alternative and used his teeth to bite the umbilical cord, then used his own clasps of his cloak to stop the bleeding of the baby's navel.

At this point Kíli should have had no energy left, and he felt that way as he lay like a heap of bones in his cell, legs still exposed, blood and placenta covering the dirty floor, and a beautiful, gorgeous dwarfling on his chest. But then the baby started to cry, loudly, and his body reacted almost instantly. The energy returned to him and he lazily tugged at his shirt, undoing it because the baby demanded it of him. And soon he was feeding the child.

Hours later, when the guard passed by, Kíli was seated in a corner of the cell with the baby tucked underneath his shirt, pressed against his chest, half-asleep but safely held by the dwarf in a manner he couldn't suffocate but was still shielded from the elf's eyes. The blood had dried upon the dirt but wasn't very visible in the dim light. The placenta was half-buried at the other corner of the cell for Kíli found no strength to hide it any better or dig any further. He was tired and had used his last strength to dress in his blood-stained trousers. And now he sat, asleep, with the baby pressing his tiny face against his chest.

* * *

Lilting voices roused the dwarf and he opened his eyes in shock. Kíli was instantly alarmed when the voices came closer to his cell and he could distinguish the Elven King. Their words were foreign but he knew all too well that even with their kind tone of voice the elves were up to no good and would probably be out and about to get their latest victim for torture.

No, he couldn't think like that. And panic filled his whole being as the baby in his arms started to squirm.

He looked down at the child who had been peacefully asleep and was half set on killing the elves for disturbing the young dwarf's sleep. But the other half of his mind was screaming at him. What if they would find the child? They had separated him from his friends. They had separated him from his brother.

They had deliberately separated him from his lover.

If they found the child would they take it away too? The thought of the baby being ripped out of his arms and thrown into another cell made him cry. Lonely, on the cold floor, with no chance to survive. They couldn't be so ruthless, could they?

But yes, somewhere deep in the back of Kíli's mind he could hear a voice saying they could be. A voice that told him the elves were indeed as ruthless as that and if they saw the baby they would take him away for sure. They would keep them for themselves, the voice said, and anger and rage filled Kíli's chest.

And then he froze.

The baby cried.


	2. Chapter 2

_And then he froze._

_The baby cried.  
_

* * *

"Oh, hush, no, no, sweetheart, don't do that, don't let them know you're here." He whispered in all honesty and all desperation but the child would not become still. Instead, the baby cried even louder. "No, little lad, please."

But it was too late. Outside his cell the voice of the guards rose from a mumble to loud orders and though he could not understand their language he knew what they must be saying.

"There's a baby around. Quickly, go find him."

And they did. Within moments of time the guards were in front of Kíli's cell, eyeing him through the bars though he did not spare them a single glance. He was far too busy trying to shush the baby but he failed. Tears sprung in his eyes as he realized why the little fellow was crying so. The door was unlocked and the King himself stepped gracefully into the cell, but Kíli paid them no heed and tugged down his shirt so the child could drink.

"A dwarf who has given birth." Thranduil said, taking quick notice of his surroundings. His light eyes darted from one corner of the cell to the dried puddle of blood and then to the dwarf and his child. "It is rare."

"Yeah, well, it's even rarer it happened in a cell." Kíli spat. He held the child's head protectively with his hand, arms crossed as the baby kept sucking hungrily.

It was clear by the way he was radiating danger that he would fight tooth and nail to protect his baby, if necessary. Thranduil took a step back from him, feeling like he had invaded a nest of swans.

"That is indeed a commendable achievement." The elf said, not showing emotions of any kind. "I will add it to my list."

"Do so," Kíli hissed, "Do so and leave us in peace."

The king stood in silence for a while with two of his guards who had now joined him by his side. They watched as the baby was being fed. Kíli did his best to ignore them, fear for losing his baby gripping his heart but he wasn't willing to show that. Besides, his attention was fully on the child now and he could not focus on anything else. His thumb gently stroked the baby's cheek as the baby slurped Kíli's milk.

"This is disturbing." Thranduil finally said, making a silent sign with his right hand and tracing slender fingers through the air to hint something Kíli couldn't and didn't understand at his guards. "I have always known dwarves could reproduce in this unethical way, but to see it happen in my home is alarming. Tell me, boy, how long gone were you when you came here?"

Kíli, annoyed but too tired to fight, huffed. He was mustering all his strength, saving all his power, in the likely case he had to defend the baby in his arms. "Nine months." He said, a sigh escaping his lips. "I already knew when we set out on our quest."

"And your quest is leading you where?"

Thranduil's sly method of questioning was paying off, for Kíli was too scared of losing the babe and he knew he would give in.

"If I tell you will I keep my baby?" He asked, big brown eyes gawking at the elf.

"Better. If you tell me you and your baby will be reunited with the father."

Kíli bit his lip. Perhaps the elves were not so ruthless after all.

"Erebor." He said, with a nod and a final sigh. He closed his eyes and held the child to his chest. With a loud pop the baby let go of Kíli's nipple and started to make yawning noises.

"We're on our way to reclaim our home. To have a place to stay. For us. For my family."

Thranduil gave a nod and the guards behind him left the cell.

Almost seconds later Fíli was thrown inside, straight on top of Kíli, and had hardly crawled on hands and knees when one of the elves yanked the baby from Kíli's arms and took the child away. They closed the door behind them, the bars still allowing them view of the elves as they locked the cell and smirked, then took the baby away.

The moment had happened too fast for Kíli to give a proper fight but he managed to throw his brother off of him and make it to the bars of his cell. Tears had sprung in his eyes but above all there was rage inside of him.

The dark-haired dwarf cried and cried and screamed and shouted while his arms moved between the bars and he grabbed and reached. But it was all to no avail. The baby was already far away, carried in the arms on an unknown elf, crying for his parents. The sound, disturbing, shook the blond dwarf who had rolled onto the floor and now sat on hands and knees, realising what it meant he heard.

Kíli's screams turned into heavy sobs as he slunk against the bars and let his forehead rest against the coolness of the metal.

Behind him Fíli finally found his voice. He had been too stunned to talk. But when he did his voice was layered with grief. "Kíli," He said, but his brother only shook and cried. "Did they just… did they took…. Was that _our_…?"

"Our child." Kíli sniffed, "Yes." Then sobbed even louder as he clutched the bars between his arms and banged his head against them. "They took our son."

Fíli was behind him in an instant and he wrapped his arms around the younger sibling's waist, hugging him close.

"When did you?" he started to ask, but couldn't finish any of his sentences for he had too many questions and also too many emotions to ask them straight. "How could I not have noticed? Kíli, oh, Kíli, did you give birth here all alone? Or did they help you? Kíli, why didn't you tell me? How could I not have noticed?"

Kíli's choked voice sounded dull and tired as he answered his brother. He wanted to comfort Fíli, for he knew his older brother had been blissfully unaware and was now probably blaming himself for the outcome. He should have told him. He should have shared such important news.

"Because I knew you would not allow me to come along." He said, voice bitter. "You would not have approved. And the thought of being without you would tear me apart. No, Fíli, they did not help me with anything. I gave birth here on this vile ground alone. I tried to hide him from their prying eyes. And now, now they took him. "

Fíli shook, his body trembling against Kíli's in grief and anger. A silent vow to retrieve their son and to punish the vile creatures who took him away from his rightful parents was made by the blond heir of Durin. But their moment cuddled together didn't last long for Kíli collapsed in Fíli's arms.

The older dwarf was crying against Kíli's back, arms locked around his brother's waist, hands feeling the belly that had hold their son not too long before, and silent curses of his own stupidity filled the room. "I'm sorry," Fíli's muffled words sounded against Kíli's back. "Had I known it would not have come to this. I would have protected you. I would have protected you both."

But he could feel Kíli lose consciousness and gently placed him on the floor.

"Kíli?" He asked, and patted the boy. Fíli repeated his name several times, then pressed the back of his hand against Kíli's forehead and let out a loud shout.

"Thranduil! Thranduil! Anyone? He's dying!"


	3. Chapter 3

_"Kíli?" He asked, and patted the boy. Fíli repeated his name several times, then pressed the back of his hand against Kíli's forehead and let out a loud shout._

_"Thranduil! Thranduil! Anyone? He's dying!"_

* * *

The sight he came to was that of the burglar smiling down at him. Bofur was by the burglar's side and carried a similar expression as the hobbit did. "He has come round." Bilbo said, taking a step back. "Let the others see him."

Kíli felt oddly empty and pressed his hands against his tummy. It felt…flat. Too flat. Too thin. Too empty, and tears sprung to his eyes as memories flooded back to him.

"The baby!" It was the first thing he could say. "The baby. Fíli?"

"Here brother." Kíli could feel someone take his hand and turned his head to look into the smiling eyes of Fíli. He seemed relieved to be holding his hand. Almost instantaneously the baby dwarf was set on Kíli's stomach and he oomphed before he laughed and hugged the child close. "Son."

"Not too tight," Fíli warned him, vaguely aware of how Kíli had been with teddies and pets when they had been kids at home. The younger sibling obliged and held the child tenderly to his chest.

"Where are we? What happened?" Kíli asked. His eyes, big and full of questions, turned to his brother. He longed for Fíli to lean in so he could plant a kiss on his lips. But somehow Fíli kept his distance, making the boy frown in irritation.

"You made a lucky escape." Gandalf said, joining the dwarf by the side of his makeshift bed. It was only now that Kíli realised they were out in the open. The others probably had made a camp.

He was placed on an especially squishy bed.

"You tell him." The wizard said, urging Fíli to take the word.

"You passed out in Thranduil's dungeon," he said, seeing Kíli spit at the mentioning of the elf's name. A warm hand was placed on top of his head, a thumb rubbing his forehead affectionately as Fíli tried to calm his brother. Kíli would have none of it and with one hand grabbed Fíli's to bring it to his lips. He tried to kiss the knuckles but Fíli pulled his hand away.

Now that was odd.

Kíli frowned and hugged the baby close to his chest. The dwarfling made a sound of pleasure and with one tiny fist managed to clutch some of Kíli's shirt. Tender eyes set on the child as the whole company felt affected by the display of emotions and the happiness of both parent and child.

"For a moment I was afraid I would lose you, brother. D-don't ever do that to me again." Fíli's voice was stuck inside his throat and tears were escaping his eyes. But Thorin had joined the company round Kíli's bed – though Kíli expected all other dwarves must be gathered somewhere around them and listening but he couldn't see them all. Thorin nudged Fíli, willing him to continue.

"Never before had I been so relieved to see an elf or to hear the soft sounds of the baby." Fíli hesitated here as he glanced down at said child.

"Our baby." He said, and Kíli tapped the baby's butt playfully at his brother's words as if to show 'yes, this is indeed our baby'.

"The elves had taken him away, Kíli, to check if he was healthy. But they returned when they heard my cries and they collected you. They took you away. Said you had some nasty fever and that you would die. But you didn't. They saved you. And Bilbo saved us. And we managed to break into your room and take you with us. We escaped." He whispered.

"Then why aren't you touching me?" Kíli looked up at him with pleading eyes. "Why aren't you hugging me and our child close to your heart and kiss the pain away?"

Fíli let out a choked sob.

"Because, Kíli, I can't."

Kíli's eyes opened wide. What was this nonsense? Had his brother not always loved him? Was not their child proof of this?

"No, he's right." It was Thorin's low voice that boomed to him and the boy tried to sit up. He found that he had little pains and that moving was all easier than he had expected. He threw the blanket off that had been placed on him and with the child on one arm threatened to stand up. But he was pushed down. By Gandalf nonetheless.

"Sit." The wizard's dark voice came.

"Boy, you must understand that you're third in line for the throne of Erebor, that you're an heir, that you're royalty. You're still young and foolish." Thorin spoke, looking everywhere but at his nephew. Kíli could see it, he noticed that Thorin's actions were out of…..shame? It pained him and the heart in his chest. "And that is why we have decided to allow you to live."

Wait, Kíli's eyes grew wide. They had decided to let him live. Was there a question of him being sentenced to death?

"All be it in exile. We will tell no one and you'd be wise to do the same."

Kíli's jaw dropped at this.

"Uncle, I don't understand."

"You clearly are fit to bear a child. But you bore the one of your brother. Such relationships are forbidden, they are unheard of. As the second heir to the throne of Durin and as the carrier of this vile, wicked child it will be you that will receive the punishment." Thorin still refused to lock eyes with the nephew he was condemning.

"Uncle, the child is not vile and wicked." Helpless eyes turned on Fíli, "Tell him."

But Fíli said nought and was biting the inside of his cheek while Thorin continued to talk and try and make his young nephew understand.

"Incest is a crime punishable by death. Your brother will go free. There's nothing of him to prove he's been part of this deed. Plus he is first in line of the throne. You are marked. Your body has been stretched by child, and had we not," he had trouble saying the next word, "loved you so you would have been sentenced to death. You and that spawn of yours. But as it is we will grant you your life. Many humans will be unaware of our customs so if you'll choose to live in a city of men you will find little harassment. But keep in mind that they too punish relationships within families by death so you'd be wise not to mention your past."

"And pass as a male, Kíli. It shouldn't be hard to convince them. But let them believe there are dwarf women. A man giving birth among other races is unheard of." Dori added, having stepped in front of Thorin.

"Don't let them catch you feed the child like that. It's viewed as odd by anyone other than dwarves." Balin said, gently patting Kíli's shoulder.

"And good luck." Dwalin said, handing Kíli his already packed bag.

The dwarf was once again in pieces as his predicament settled in his mind and the meaning of all the words he had heard became clear. He was exiled, kicked away from his family. And that was supposed to be a kindness? They sent him to a city of men instead of to his death?

He could hardly see through the tears in his eyes but somewhere among the dwarves in front of him he could distinguish golden braids and knew it must be his brother. "Will you not speak?" He sobbed, finally allowed to stand up from his makeshift bed.

He made his way over to Fíli but was stopped before he could reach him. It was that blasted wizard with his cane again, blocking him by pointing the stick at his waist. Kíli repositioned the child on his arm. Their son had grown incredibly quiet.

"He is yours too, you know?" Kíli suddenly shouted. "He's yours too!"

The desperation sounded in his voice and Fíli turned away from him to hide the fresh tears in his eyes. _So he was affected,_ Kíli thought with bitter joy. He'd make sure to leave a lasting impression before he would be forced to leave his brother's side.

"You knew all along." It wasn't Fíli's reply but it was the voice of one of the other dwarves: Nori. "You knew all along it was wrong. It's a sin. And yet you encouraged him to continue. Now please, go."

But Kíli wasn't done yet. He could take the blame, he could be the black sheep and spare his brother shame, he could do all of it. But he couldn't fathom why his brother seemed so cold and distant.

"Will you not even look at him? Will you not kiss him goodbye as I go? No?" Fíli's lack of movement and silence of words was the only reply to his young sibling. Kíli blinked the tears from his eyes. He composed himself and growled at the blond dwarf he had called brother. "Then so be it." He turned to Thorin instead now. The stubborn King was naturally looking in the opposite direction as well.

"Uncle, I wish for you to kill me. Without Fíli I cannot live."

The man stirred. "Don't be stupid, rascal." Thorin snarled. "Death is denied to you. You will not waste any more of our time. Leave."

Kíli's brown eyes grew fierce as he looked round the company one last time, seeing a variation of faces and expressions all from sad to repenting, but also one or two of disgust. He hopped the child on his arm, then drew him close, protectively. He could feel the baby was holding his breath somehow, and wondered if he was aware of what was going on.

"I was going to call him after you, Thorin." He growled at his uncle. "Or after your brother, but I won't do so now. This child will carry a proud name. A proud dwarven name. And he will grow up to shine. But none of you will ever see his rays of light for you cast him out of your lives and into the shadow. That's the regret you will have to live with."

"Boy," came Thorin's bark as a reply. He had not called him nephew or Kíli since the birth, Kíli noticed. He'd been completely and utterly disgraced and estranged from his family and hung his head in shame. "I care not about your choice of names. Now leave before I change my mind and decide to have all three of your heads cut off."

Kíli's head snapped up. His dark eyes finally locked with Fíli's and he could feel sadness grip his heart. The heir of Durin looked crestfallen. His blue eyes were glazed and dull, his hand twitching to reach for the boy and the babe he wanted to claim as his own. But the worst of it all was that he did absolutely nothing. He said nothing, made no move or attempt to console his brother or stand up for him. And though Kíli was vaguely aware of how strict his brother had been when it had come to their rules and etiquettes, and how important the fate of their folk and the approval of their family and minions had been for him he now just wished Fíli would cast all responsibilities aside and fight for what truly mattered. Them, together. All three of them. As a family.

There was a final nod as Kíli accepted his fate. And perhaps, he thought somewhere deep in his mind, it was for the better this way. A baby wasn't supposed to be part of a quest to reclaim a fallen kingdom and battle a fearsome dragon. Perhaps, he told himself, that was why Fíli was so silent and offered no help. Kíli liked to think his brother wanted them safe, parent and child. And perhaps he would come looking for him after Erebor was conquered. Though Kíli knew now that it would never be their home. It might just be false hope, but how else could he explain Fíli's behaviour as he was sent away with a child only a day old.

Heavy footsteps shaped the mud. He was nothing but a silhouette of a hunched figure, wearing his blue cloak like shield.

As Kíli walked away he could feel his heart scream for his brother.

_Perhaps almost as loud as the cries of the child in his arms._


	4. Chapter 4

_As Kíli walked away he could feel his heart scream for his brother._

_Perhaps almost as loud as the cries of the child in his arms._

* * *

The dawn found a young dwarf and his son in the meadow. The dark-haired boy was gently caressing the dwarfling's cheek as the baby made bubbling noises. "Hey little fellow," Kíli said with a smile, his finger tracing the baby's soft skin.

The little man took his father's finger in his mouth and started to suck eagerly on it, and Kíli could not help but laugh as he tried to remove the now vacuumed finger from his baby's lips. "No, No, Víli, this isn't a nipple. It won't give you any drink." The child let go and Kíli hugged him close.

With his head resting against the baby's, he glanced at the village ahead of them.

This had become a ritual. Each morning he would take the child with him into the meadow and sit down on a rock to watch the sunrise. Each time he'd imagine Fíli to be there with him, to sit by his side and tell him it would all be all right. Kíli would tell tales to their son. Stories about the bravery of the ancient dwarves, memories of time spent with his brother, fairy tales that included their little family meeting a happy end. He told them all to Víli before taking the boy back into the stinking town of Men which now had become their home. They owned a room above the shops. It was just one small room, but it was all Kíli could afford and it was enough.

"I miss him." Kíli's whisper was caught by the soft breeze and carried away.

The town, filled with human beings, always carried the scent of Mankind and their sweat and blood. Kíli was looked upon, served last in shops, avoided in conversation and told more than once to be lucky to have been offered a job in one of the many forges the town counted. He was lucky, there was no denying. Things could have ended far worse for him and the child.

He knew his craftsmanship was fine, better even than that of all the other smiths in town, but still he was paid a lower wage than the Men at the workplace. He knew he was being discriminated. He knew he was handled unequally and unkind by his colleagues but he didn't feel the need to fight back.

In a way he was scared of losing the home he had for his son, of being outcast again, of having the attention on him and being the focus of the other Men. What if they found out about his ability to bear a child? And that the baby was his brother's too? What if they discovered the truth?

Many a time he had sat down and tried to write his mother a letter. He wanted to explain things to her, make her feel proud for having a grandson, but he could not.

No words took away Thorin's bitter reproach and nothing he wrote down would take away that nagging feeling his mother would abandon him like the rest of them had.

Perhaps it was better if she did not know.

He looked at Víli. The child was finally smiling again.

Throughout their journey the child had not smiled, only cried for food and for his father. It had pained Kíli that he could understand his son's longing so. They both wanted their family to be complete.

Alas, it was not. Only after they had arrived in the town and had settled in their small room above the shops did Víli smile. It was a small smile, hardly visible, and it had come after Kíli had fallen onto the bed with the child nestled on his chest. He was relieved that they had found shelter.

"We have a bed, we'll have some proper food. In fact, Víli, I think we almost have us a home." And Víli had actually smiled for the first time since they had left Fíli behind.

And now he smiled again, and it gave Kíli courage. He would have to be at work soon and as always Víli would be with him in the smithy. There was a kind lady who had offered to look after him for a coin a day, but that was too expensive and besides, Kíli couldn't bear so much time away from his son. The child needed to be fed, something Kíli managed to do in secret during the breaks or whenever the others weren't looking and he could slip into a secluded corner of the shop.

Mind you, the Men didn't pay him much attention, so feeding Víli was really easy to do without being caught.

Though he would be chided afterwards for having spent time with 'the little bugger' but he was really thankful that his employer had at least some heart. He had explained to the man that he was a single parent with no relatives and that he couldn't let the baby, the only piece of his lover alive, die. His boss had snorted, "such an ugly creature", made some vile comments, "only good for pooping and pissing over the place", tried to twist his way around having a baby at the working place but finally relented. And so far Víli had been a formidable child. He hardly cried. Though the environment was anything but healthy for the babe he behaved well and Kíli kept bringing him. He had no other options.

"You'll be a good boy today, Víli." Kíli told his son as he rose with the child in his arms. "Mr Thackery has threatened to throw us both out if you cry again today. He's very patient for a Man and we can't stretch his hospitality any further." He nuzzled his baby's nose.

"Will you promise not to cry loudly?" The boy said nothing, as he could not speak yet, but big blue eyes gazed up into his own and Kíli could feel his heart melt. "That's a good lad." He kissed Víli's forehead and set pace for the town.

The sun was rising. With each step he took Víli grew more and more silent. And then he was glancing down at the little lad to see what had taken the baby's interest. "You don't have to be silent now, love. Just when we're in the smithy." He cooed, afraid that the silence would only last till they reached the shop and they would be kicked out for Víli bawling his eyes out.

"Which smithy would that be?"

Kíli froze.

He knew that voice. And apparently Víli recognised the voice too for the dwarfling squeaked in joy. When Kíli turned he thought he had lost his sanity for there, in front of him, stood his brother.

Truth to be told he looked worse for wear. His clothing was ragged, his face besmirched, but his blue eyes sparkled with joy and love. He looked like a beggar in love.

"Fíli?"

"Kee, I'm sorry I can't keep this long. You are, Oh my, you two are grown so much." Fíli's choked voice reached Kíli's ears like music and the younger brother tried to hug the older.

Kíli's arm reached for Fíli's chest but his hand grabbed right through him. He gasped and Víli, cradled on his left arm, started to cry softly. The little lad opened his eyes during crying though, and it was as if he knew how important it was to suck up the image of his father. It was as if crying with his eyes closed was fatal and every moment with him counted. Kíli noticed but only subconsciously. He was too frustrated and distressed by his hand slipping through Fíli as if he were but a ghost. "Why can't I touch you?" He cried.

Fíli shrugged, sadly, guilt-eaten.

"It's Gandalf's doing this. He knows of my heartbreak the moment you and our little one were cast out. It's magic, Kee, and it's taking up a whole lot of his energy so I can't be long. I just," His voice broke, " I just wanted to check in on you. See if you and our baby son were all right." His blue eyes softened and Kíli could read the grief in them. It made him even more bold in his actions.

"Never better," Kíli joked, then realized that it could not cover up for the painful truth and his smile dwindled. "Oh, I almost forgot….. this is Víli. Fíli, meet your son." He hopped the baby on his arm and looked from Víli to his brother to see the admiration and love in his eyes. Víli had grown quiet again, only sobbing with soft gasps, and tried to curl his little hands in Kíli's vest. His large blue eyes were focused upon Fíli though and would not leave him.

Fíli laughed. "You named him after me?" His grin expanded and he folded his arms in front of his chest then cocked his head just like in the good old days. "How silly, bro."

"Not you. Víli, with a 'V'. It stands for desire, because _I_ wanted him, and protection, and all heroic stuff your name seems to lack." Kíli grinned. They were teasing each other again like they should and for a moment it was as if Fíli was truly here and nothing had changed between them.

But Fíli was silent though, musing. "I like it, Kíli." His blue eyes were unfocused as he thought before they snapped back to little Víli and he smiled once more. "I like it a lot." Fíli turned his eyes back to Kíli with an expression that was grave and solemn. "Now you take good care of Ví."

"I am. Fee, when will you be back?" Kíli rambled for he didn't know how much time was given to them. He did know the importance of telling Fíli where to find them so his brother could come looking for them once their quest was done. "I'm in Húlwood, a tiny town north of Lake-town. So tiny it isn't even on any map." He paused, then swallowed. "I need you, Fíli. We both do."

"I know." Was all his golden-haired brother could say, "And I asked Gandalf to do this for me because I," He halted, conflict playing on his face as he knitted his brows and parted his lips. A thought clearly flashed through his mind and words were on the verge of being spoken, but then he swallowed them, shook his head and replaced the words with others that were equally as true.

"I need you too."

But what he hadn't dare say, _I just wanted to see you one last time before we go into battle, brother,_ was left unspoken.

And his image faded.

Kíli grasped for his brother one last time and blinked away the tears at the realisation that the link between them was broken.

"Gandalf's power must have been up." He grumbled in annoyance. To say he was slightly irritated would have been a huge understatement. Víli was surprisingly quiet and pale and he looked at the little fellow with worry.

"Hey, it's okay, Ví, daddy will be back for us soon and then we can live happily ever after, just like in the tales I told you. Imagine," he said, chuckling as if he found himself rather amusing, "there'll be a day when it's like he has never left."

His voice was reduced to a whisper. "There'll be a day when it's like we've always been together."

He hugged Víli close and pressed the baby's head against his cheek. In this manner he carried him back to the town. The meeting with Fíli had brought him in high spirits and restored the hope he slowly had been losing on being reunited (even though he would never admit that he was losing hope for Fíli would ALWAYS find a way back to him).

As he saw the distance to the town diminish he counted the days he had been living in exile. And he started to count the miles to Erebor from their last destination they'd been at together: Mirkwood. And he started to put two and two together and frowned heavily at the grim discovery his brain made but instantly tried to deny.

The journey couldn't have been THIS long. "If only I had known where my brother's at." He pursed his lips as the thoughts consumed him. Surely he should have been in Erebor already, even with delay. Then why had he not heard news of the victory of his kin? They obviously were still alive so that means they must have won, right? Or had they run into unforeseen trouble? But if so who were they fighting? And why was his brother looking worse for wear when he should look like a King. Fíli was the heir of Durin, after all, and Kíli could not imagine Thorin disowning him as well. Then he would have no kin left to rise to the throne in his absence. No, Fíli had been trained and schooled for this and it was illogical that he had left Thorin's side.

Kíli cast the thoughts aside as he entered the workshop and flashed a smile at his fellow workmen there just because he knew it would annoy them. He placed Víli on one of the working tables, in a self-made cradle, and tucked the blankets to the baby's chin.

"Now remember what I said, little one, be good." He kissed his baby's head and gently brushed a thumb past the child's cheek. Víli squeaked and started to chew happily on a corner of the blanket. Kíli couldn't help but to mirror the smile.

"Yes, I'm excited after having seen Daddy too." With another affectionate touch to the dwarfling's cheek he turned away to start on today's chores.

"There's the ugly gnome again." One of the Men said, "Hello misfit. Brought yer short midget with ye." Kíli ignored them and continued to smile.

"How's the gargoyle doing? You know if he cries we get to throw ye out and beat ye lot to pulp." One of the other Men said, smirking evilly as he pushed against Kíli in an attempt to gain a reaction from him.

But Kíli was strong and merely turned to flash him a smile. He knew that would aggravate them more than yelling or fighting. All he had to do was remind kind.

"Ye're useless." The man said with a snorting sound, yet Kíli continued hammering away like he had.

"He might be ugly to you but he's most beautiful to me." The dwarf's words had the Men roaring with laughter.

"My God, ye need yer eyes punched out, lad." One of them said. "Ugly set of goblins."

Needless to say, Kíli was overjoyed when the Men started discussing the town's women and left him to his craft. Víli cried twice, but he could easily stop the little one and tiptoe into the cupboard next to his working spot to feed him and to shush him.

When just before the end of the day the other men decided to pick on him again he felt like they could do anything to him and he would not break. He had seen Fíli today. He had spoken to him. He had told him where he was and had shown Víli to him. Fíli had looked so proud, and Kíli had felt so proud to see.

Nothing could ruin his day or his spirits.

Not even when Mr Thackery threatened to throttle the child for crying when one of the other Men had slammed a hammer on the table near to his tiny head. The sound had scared him badly and probably hurt his ears. Kíli's rush to his side wasn't enough to calm him, it took a while, and of course their employer had to complain about it. But Kíli felt stronger than ever before and when, just before the men would leave for home, one of them pushed him hard enough to fall with his hand on the forge and burn his palm he could not help but laugh with them, silencing their roars of laughter by joining their mockery of him. The Men actually looked ashamed now as they left in silence, not greeting him nor pushing him on their way out. Kíli bandaged his burnt hand and took Víli up on his arm.

"This seems to be a good task for Oin, if he had been around." He mused and the baby smiled at him. "Yes, little one, good old Oin. You remember him, don't you? From the tales I tell you? Well he's very good with healing and medicine."

It was easier to ignoring the searing pain of his hand while he talked cheerfully to Víli and the baby smiled back at him and made noises. "And your poor Da needs some treatment for his hand now, doesn't he?"

"Ma."

He was caught speechless for a moment, overcome by pride, before he realized just what Víli had been saying. His first word. The pride was soon replaced by a sinking feeling in his gut. Fíli had not been here to hear Víli's first word.

"Ma." The child jousted again. "Ma. Ma. Mama."

Kíli's cheeks burned a bright red and he hesitated. "Ah….er… right." He hung his head so his bangs hid his eyes. This wasn't the name he had imagined for Víli to use for him. Had he not been trying to get Ví to call him 'da' for a while now? Or just Kee. Or anything but the feminine form of mother which would have people look at him awkwardly in the streets. He growled under his breath and little Víli cocked his head confused. He probably wondered if he had done something wrong and with a trembling lip he carefully asked "mama?"

The dark-haired dwarf raised his head to reveal glistening eyes and a small smile on his lips. It was a visible relief for the baby who instantly dared to smile again. "Mama, Mama!" The child started, loud and enthusiastically, and Kíli laughed loudly while he cradled the baby to his chest.

Still laughing, he exited the smithy and ignored Mr Thackery's disapproving stare on his way out. The way back to their room wasn't that long, but Kíli took is time and sauntered with the babe on his arm. He contemplated for a moment if he should visit the local doctor, and kept in front of the doctor's window for a while before he concluded he really didn't have the money and would have to suffer the blisters and third-degree wounds. He had some knowledge of fire-injury but had no idea how bad his injury actually was. Yet he couldn't go and ask, it would cost him another coin and he needed food and supplies. He sniffed Víli and frowned.

"Someone's been a busy boy. Well, better out than in they say. Once we get home I'll take off your nappy, wash it, and you'll have a nice and clean one." He pressed a finger to his lip, but hissed for it was his burnt one and quickly lowered his hand. "Perhaps I can get some more old covers to make you a new pair."

He glanced apologetically at the baby. "Sorry, lad, I've never been taught how to take care of a babe or how to make nappies so uh….well, so long as you don't complain about how they wear it's okay, right?"

He smiled toothily at the child who closed his eyes happily and clapped his tiny hands together. "Mama!"

"Right!" Kíli chirped. "I'm glad you agree."

They were rounding another corner and the shops harbouring their home came into view.

Then the news came.

"Erebor is conquered." A shouting newsboy announced as he made his way down the street. "The dwarves won back the City under the Mountain."

Several of the pedestrians stopped to turn at the news and one or two of the Men cast a glance in Kíli's direction. The young dwarf gasped at the news he had been waiting for. They had done it! They had succeeded. His mouth twitched into a wide smile and he was about to cuddle Víli and explain to him what this news meant when the shouting boy rushed down the street and continued the message.

"Casualties; Thorin, son of Thrain, and Fíli, son of Dís. This means the end of the line of Durin. The Kingdom is to be taken by Dáin."

"What?" Kíli had frozen, Víli was clutched to his chest. Had he just heard that right? His smile was instantly wiped from his face as dread overtook him. Was this why Fíli had looked so bad and had appeared to him like a ghost?

"And so shall not end the line of Durin," Kíli bitterly remarked as he sank to his knees, tears threatening his eyes. He looked at his baby, "we still live."


End file.
